Valentine's day edition

So it's Valentine's day, yay!?! I have to admit that I'm kind of glad that Germany doesn't really celebrate it like they do in the US. Of course since this is also 'Singles awareness day', and I happen to be single, I would be remiss to comment on relationships/ advice/ words from others.

Some overall life advice, some of which are from friends, some from myself, and general life lessons:

• 'To thine own self, be true. And focus on all that is good. And help all around you who need it.' (P.H.A.)
• Sometimes life throws you a bunch of s**t, but it's up to you on how you handle it/ make the best of a bad situation.
• 'Network and cultivate relationships' (L. M-R.)
• 'Gut instincts are there for a reason. Go with them!' (J.H.)
• 'Wipe' (J.G.)
• 'A great relationship is made of two things: 1. Finding the right person and 2. being the right person' (H.Z.)
• 'Like water rolling off of a duck, let it go and swim on' (V.S.)
• 'Inspiration comes with action, not before it' (K.L.H.)
• 'You can talk to yourself as much as you want, as long as you don't lie' (a Mr. Cooper)
• 'If your ship doesn't come in, swim out to it' (Jonathan Winters)
• 'The way you do anything is the way you do everything' (H.S.)
• 'When you give to others to the degree that you sacrifice yourself, you make the other person a thief' (Ivanla Vanzant)
• 'Choose to inhale, don't breathe simply to exist' (Mattie Stepanek)
• One of my new favorites: 'Walk this earth like you own it.... because you do' (S.D.)
• 'Every failure makes you stronger, and of late strive to be just ok' (D.P.)

I would also recommend checking out this article, which had some amazing advice:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dawn-gluskin/life-lessons_b_4629195.html

Some of my favorite parts from it include the following:

In being true to yourself, you can't possibly make everybody else happy


A walk in nature cures a lot. 

Perfectionism is an illusion. 

 
We are powerful creators. Seriously, bad-asses. With intention, focus, and persistence -- anything is possible. Know this.  

Surround yourself with people who love and support you.

 
Say "YES!" to everything that lights you up. Say "no", unapologetically, to anything that doesn't excite you or you don't have the bandwidth for. Time is one of our most precious resources that we can never get back. Manage it wisely.  

Overcoming your fears is one of the most empowering things you can ever do for yourself.
  (All from Dawn Gluskin)

• Another good blog posting that I recommend:

 http://www.theminimalists.com/30lessons/  

One of the best pieces from it- 'You must make change a must. I knew that I wanted to change my life for the longest time. I knew I was unhappy, unsatisfied, and unfulfilled. I knew I didn’t have freedom. Not real freedom. The problem was that I knew these things intellectually but not emotionally. I didn’t have the feeling in my gut that things must change. I knew they should change, but the change wasn’t a must for me, and thus it didn’t happen. Anthony Robbins has a good aphorism to describe all these shoulds in your life: he says “after a while you end up shoulding all over yourself.” But once you understand these things on an emotional level you are able to turn your shoulds into musts. I believe that that is the pivotal point, that is when you get leverage, that is when you are compelled to take action. Thus, a decision is not a real decision until it is a must for you, until you feel it on your nerve-endings, until you are compelled to take action. Once your shoulds have turned into musts, then you have made a real decision.' (Joshua Fields Milburn)

'Happiness is not for sale in any store. We can’t buy happiness. Hell, it sounds cliché to even say that, and yet we search the aisles and shelves and pages on eBay in search of something more, something to fill the void. But we can’t fill the void with stuff. It doesn’t work that way, no matter how hard we try or how much stuff we buy, because that stuff won’t make us happy. At best it will pacify us momentarily. At worst it will ruin our lives, leaving us empty and depressed and even more alone, alone among a sea of material items—sometimes a crowded room can feel the most alone. The truth is that we are all going to die, and heaping our tombs with treasure will not save us from this fate. Ryan and I wrote about happiness for Dave Bruno’s 100 Thing Challenge: The Minimalists On Happiness.' (Joshua Fields Milburn)

Now as to the 'single awareness day' component to the blog:

Do not tell someone who's single that they are too picky.... you have no idea what kinds of offers/dates/ whatever they've had recently.

• Is it being picky when you won't 'settle' for someone who doesn't understand the words 'slow down' and 'no' regardless if it's in written form or verbal?
• If someone isn't listening to these key words, it's not a safe situation to be in.
• Is it being picky when said person keeps apologizing not for saying what they are saying? I'd rather someone be sorry for something they said versus being sorry that I felt that way.
• Is it being picky to not 'go out' with someone who is trying to get a one night stand and you want a relationship?
• Is it being picky when someone is not treating you with respect and you don't want to/have to put up with that? Having self respect is not a crime, and wanting to be treated right isn't either.
• Is it being picky when you don't want to date someone is being uber creepy/ exhibiting stalker like behavior? Pepper spray anyone?

Just a few examples of why telling someone they're picky when they have the above situations pisses them the hell off. Not to say good instances don't happen, but it's not being picky when you don't want to put yourself in an unsafe situation or in a place where you are not within reasonable boundaries.

One other point, which may be relevant to more than just me. Sometimes I choose to dress up extra nice, which by my definition, is by not wearing jeans. This does not equate to me dressing up to impress anyone/ go on a date, which sometimes might be the case, but most times I just do it for myself.